hey God...

i would love to have a tattoo of that design running down my back... is that blasphemous?


pretty lavishly decorated church! you havent even seen the other part of it. the hallways, upstairs, tabernacle, alter. they are all equally grand. i actually look forward to holding mass in these halls. these picture simply do not justly capture the minute details and all the gold gilded posts. architecture of the church also has great acoustics.
i love the minister here. he is too funny :-) his sermons contain modern topics and problems.

a little taste...

small section of the film we are developing for a finals project.
ive spent almost everyday working on this assignment. from 12 to 8.
hella fun to work on though. its in vietnamese...

Downtown Iceskating

okay you have been waiting for this.

• when: Saturday, January 3
• 120 S. Market St, San Jose
• bring $ 15 for rentals
• time: noonish to whenever. afterwords we'll hang out, yes?

sounds fun! i have not went iceskating since my the middlechool era

i cried

"I can't be with you as your boyfriend,
but that doesn't mean that I don't love you."

Merry Christmas Ya'll!

party after party after party. Ive JUST gotten home like right now.
so tired... ill tell you about my day, but im really sleepy right now.
STEVEN! the first thing i did was open your gift. I LOVE YOU. the socks im wearing to sleep tonight to keep me warm. thanks for the invitation code VIcks i will soon uploads some pictures.mmm. another party tomorrow, this time with the sanjose kids. hide and seek time!
picture posting coming up, so you can see how cute i looked in my coat :9

21:33] fly 1 nh 1 ghr: watch out if someone slaps you in ur sleep

flipturn

So, i have to work on my walls and break outs

1. keep speed when approaching the wall.
   
2. throw your body into a quick flip
3. transfer your speed into the push off.
   
4. streamline body with your arms tucked neatly behind your ear.
5. dolphin kick using your entire body. turn to your stomach
   
6. in first stroke, dont take a breath

huzzah, this practice was the last until January 5. we had hot cocoa and sugar cookies to complement the easy set. 10x hundreds. AJ also swam with us, i think he looks like a shark. with his braces and reflector goggles, its very intimidating!

Royale's shower scene!

mmm, basically spent the day working on the film. leaving tomorrow fer Sacramento. annnd finally getting my haircut up there. aah, and i send love for my hubby, thanks for the scans! dont forget my present. xoxo

SAT: chainsaw massacare and horror marathon

hot hot

Ive been up with Ross for three hours. talking about hot people. and photoshopping.
A guyXguy movie is actually pretty good. if you know what to watch. but, i cant tell cause i hafta keep it a secret. find it on ur own.

made a run to IKEA today. bought 2 sheepskin rugs,pottedplants,purple bedsheets, wrapping paper. and other misc. things for my house.

im sleepy now.

BANG!

Damn. last day was full of adventure. Rally was aight' but i sat next to the boringest crowd. Like, the asains that don't cheer much durin the "one one" "oh nine" back and forth battle. Vicky, next time we will have a meeting stop kk? to avoid this wrapping and giving out gifts is so fun. i bought really nice parmchment paper-seque ones from IKEA and tied the packages with yarn. looks so nice! the temptation to rip open Steven's gift is overwhelming, i must put it out of my sight. Thanks Vicks for the adorable sweaterdress! class time was cool, i just forgot the finals paper for History, but Glaubitt is letting me turn it in after break. So, this winter vacation really started with a bang! after dropping off Vicky at her house i go home. ten seconds later Pat and Ross call and say there coming right over. Instead of working on the film we spend about an hour playing rockband. On like, the loudest volume it would go. im the singer! Ross is actually pretty good at the drums, exept i have to do the pedal for him. Patrick only plays the guitar.then Andrew comes over and we do more songs until we decide to walk back to Pat's house. The group discussess the topic and what were going to do. Go to Ross's house ( which is just across the road). you have to wait until there is a lull in traffic then, run like crazy across all four lanes! This whole time Andrew brought along a big sweeper. i have no idea why. Ross' house it pretty nice inside. His room on the other hand...there is litteraly clothes strewn all over the floor. you can't even walk to the bed ( mattress on the floor) without stepping on his boxers, shirts, jeans, and blankets. his closet has nothing in it, just empty hangers. everything is on the ground or stuffed into the cabinet haphazardly. We venture into the attic to look for clothes. so scary, you climb up a rickety ladder in the garage. There are boxes of Ross' baby clothes. " keeping them for my future children!" When we get back we spend two hours working out the first scenes. I went to piano practice for two hours and came back right after. We eat and discuss the plot of our little production. I leave about tenish? Back home i whip out my old cd and play with my brother. such memories. TODAY my mom wakes me up at eight and we head off to Stoneridge with my Auntie. crazy shopping here. i pretty much hot off eveyone on my wishlist. Huzzah i scored some winter apparel here to keep me warm.

• H&M: coat, purple cowl neck jacket ( so soft!)

• J Crew:light blue-grey cardigan with crystal buttons

haha. not much, but theyre fullpriced. exept coat( 1/2 off from 100) all i need now are grey boots, new jeans, and long sleeves.i will come back for that cream coloured cardi from Jcrew, i think ill get it for christmas.i was so angry they didnt stock the rosette headband i was coveting! i was going to purchase it on this trip but alas it was nowhere to be found. mostly shopped for my family though. scored some super skinny jeans for my little brother at Zumiez. pshaw! each one of us was lugging about 5 big shopping bags each. ugg. finished at about 3oclock. shopping is exhausting and i fell asleep on the way home. after dropping off auntie i go grocery shopping. im cooking tempura squid tomorow. yay. man, it was crazy filming when i came back from the market. starting to write down the script and stuff. hella crazy stuff be goin' down. i dont even care if i look stupid anymore cause its hella fun working on this project. we must spent half an hour working on a scene that takes up one minute. working on script writing and choreographing action scenes currently. more tomorow! Ross has become another family member now. the only time he goes home is to take a shower and change. he just sleeps over on the couch. another cousin for me?

from schooloop

In 1973 Coach I got his first job coaching in Richmond, California next door to the same high school from the movie "Coach Carter". It was a diverse ethnic mix with many of our stars being African American. Coach Isberg coached the beginners and started the careers of several Hispanic and African American future superstars. ANYONE WHO HAS THE OPPORTUNITY CAN BE A GOOD SWIMMER. HAVING THE RIGHT SKIN COLOR OR COMING FROM THE CORRECT CONTINENT OR NEIGHBORHOOD IS NOT A REQUIREMENT.

i think what hes trying to say is: i dont want any more asians on the swim team please.
haha

ribbon, markers,yarn,tissue paper

this is pretty much what i want. but, the bangs are gonna be sideswept. go figure, this is the haircolor Ive been coveting also. identity stealer

oh man. wrapping up gifts tonight.
heehee, my mommy got all my teachers starbucks cards. think Mr. Luc will give my extra credit?ah, that reminds me. i have no clue what i will get on the test i took today. crossing my fingers.
YEAH!! im super exited for tomoroww!! half day, rally ( GO, 2011), parties in each class! whoo whoo!
the beginiing of my long awaited vacation!
summer crew movie night!
film project filming!
12o clock alarm clock settings!
brand new haircut!
Redecorating my room!
ice skating!
shopping!
Christmas in Sacramento and my house!
wrapping gifts!
sixteenth birthday!
New years party!
and wild nights of gossiping, scary stories, and hide-and-seek!!

thrift shop idols

piksi

jealous of how she can pull anything off! this lovely lady has influenced the way i dress now.

irene adler

very good sense of style. i like how she layers outfits together

nigahiga

make a short story long

wow, only Mr. Isberg can spend an entire lunch period telling us how its okay to be slow of the swim team. we didn't even get to elect team captains. Isberg was like " this is definitely an asian swimteam "when we didnt know the puchunki or whatever award was. Meg Trask, who was sitting next to me was all wtf? but, this year will be fun because the team has moved to B league.Which, frankly makes me look good. ego booster much?
"Shit Isberg ! You've been on the team for all 4 years, and outlasted dozens of swimmers that were faster than you. I guess I can give you one f---ing varsity letter !"

Vickie and me are going to design the swimteam shirts this year. thinking American apparel long sleeves? cute cute

sorry guys, i got to do my homework and history project now. holla!
oh, Ryan. i tried to look for you...so i could give you my pictures to upload...

freak

Friday seems to be the line for about everything. oh god, i hope i get it all done in time...
so, im skipping swimming this week to catch up on everything. actually i feel quite productive today. i finished all my hw before eight. now, i just gotta work on my history research project and english blog. the weather today made me relize how utterly prepared i am for the frigid weather ( californian standard). in the morning i looked through my clothes. i have no coats to speak of!
so, perhaps when i get my haircut ( weekend weekend weekend= proper salon in Palo Alto! ) i can pick up some proper winter attire. i hope i can dye my hair too. we'll see. i want to come back from break looking different.
ah, i cant wait to cut my discusting long hair. im going for: razored A-line, long fringes, side bangs. just have to find a proper picture now. but, alas, i have no time! mmm, on friday i believe is the first movie meeting at Pat's house. haha, Ross is totally into this. Lightsabers, Lightning Powers, Slow Mo, guns, kidnapping and fighting. God help us.


Jesus, please give me the strength to finish the scarf. amen

just what i want

Amphibious Functionality & Good Looks
A blessing to behold and a joy to use - inside and outside of the water. Take a walk right out of that glitzy swimming pool, head across the patio, through the lobby, and straight into the grand ballroom. Ensure that you're snapping away a steady volley of continuous Frogeye shots throughout your journey. Though the bystanders around may find your bathing suit and water-dripping body a bit shocking, it is fully guaranteed that the Frogeye camera will not miss a beat: both yielding a multitude of colorful, beautiful images, and looking just as good in your hand whether you're diving off the high board or tracking chlorinated water across the dance floor.



75 bucks; lomography.com~

"its getting chilly."
"its not", he said softly." what happened?"
" he died. Listen. You don't want all this." She tossed aside the shell Charlie had so carefully chosen for her.
He handed her another.

- Sarah Stonich;the Ice Chorus

spin spin

practice practice practice
weekend was spent cleaning up my office space
got the yarn at Michael s the other day, and the 5.5 needle, i can change yarns colors and double stitch now. i have the design down i just dont know if i have time. i got to be dedicated!

i fell asleep clutching a Lindor chocolate bar. with the book ive been reading halfopened with my finger saving my place stuck in the pages in my other hand. When i awoke it was raining and i just lay there listening. then i read for half an hour. just spent the day practicing my crocheting. looked online for design ideas. also yelped a bit. it was a comfortable cottage like day just relaxing and catching up on homework.
and looking at clothes.


basically ate rice, tofu and kimchi for lunch and dinner. and a glass of milk.

smokin

• 1. Scarf, Henrik Vibskov
• 2. Safari jacket, Zara
• 3. Oversized t-shirt, Filippa K
• 4. Chinos , H&M
• 5. Boots, Rizzo

• 1. Scarf , H&M
• 2. Blazer, H&M
• 3. Plaid shirt, Filippa K
• 4. Grey jeans with lots of zippers , April 77
• 5. Boots, Asos

DAMN. this boy is fine. Asian boy from Oslo, Norway




Andre W. hurry and start lookbooking

cup of tea'

more on style:
http://www.skonalife.blogspot.com/
im in love with the british/boarding school inspired look for guys.
looks really put together and different. simply delicious. i want to ravage the next guy that i see in a wool bowtie. not really. but, you never know :d

endless escalator

most random person to meet at King's library: Andre. W
how embarrassing, when i met him i had an armful of books. just kinda wandering the bottom floor looking for my mom. Then he calls out my name and i almost dropped them all. That boy was volunteering for community service. What a model citizen. The weather outside was real chilly and windy and i was shivering in my sweater. Yet, here he is in a plain white shirt. Are guys naturally warmer? i remember that when i went camping it was warm in the tent at night. It was all guys and i could feel the body heat radiate off of them. that's a good thing. Cause then guys can give their sweaters to their girlfriends and not freeze to their untimely, romantic deaths .
i want a boyfriend cardigan. :- (
that reminds me, my ex-beau streaks. haha

cause im a nerd like that'

If life was a graph, you would be my asymptote. No matter how close i get to you we'll never be together.

" there is no second place to stand. When two people are fighting for one thing. If you take second place, that's last" - staircase to heaven

Ah! this drama is really good so far. i want to claw out that 's cheek. the selfish one, watch the first episode. i guarantee you will outraged and feel an urge to punch her. I GUARANTEE
others dramas i highly recommend:

1. hana yori dango (jdrama) really good story
   
2. who are you (kdrama)
3. hana kimi ( taiwan or jap version, i watched both)
4. Ouran high school host club ( , i know its cheesy.i usually dont watch ... but its hella funny. i was falling out of my seat sometimes.)
5. Lovely Complex (japmovie)
6. Seducing Mr.Perfect ( kmovie)
7. Coffee prince ( kdrama) me and my bro watch it together. made me cry
   

ok guys, i know it sounds hella asian. but, just try it out. they have a great plot, it really draws you in. and the subtittles really give you a diferent experience for film watching. and everyone is hot. insanely hot. im very picky about that.
mmm. i dont usual cry really. but i sobbing at the beginning of who are you. first ep too! they write it so well. rave rave rave

if you are who you say you are...

during christmas break i shall be filming a video with Ross. fun!
so its basically Duc, Patrick, Nick and Andrew. who is Duc? Ross said hes cute...but i dunno
Ross says i have to act. really act. outta my comfort zone. serious
its going to be hilarious and i hope i just hope i dont look like a buffoon on camera. :-'
my brother has a g-friend. so cute. me on the other hand... i got my Ryan!

these are circle lenses. contacts that make your eyes look bigger. Miguel told me bout' them cause we were talking about types of contacts. i think they make you look high cause theyre so dilated



"the hardest part of holding on, is letting go". thnx Brenden you freak.

red zone

canceling all sports? preposterous.
i never knew the economy was this bad. homes lost, no food, no new christmas gifts. it just never hit me personally until now.
i know it sounds horrible horrible horrible. but, we need to take drastic measures so we can fix this problem! i mean, the situation could get a lot worse, very quickly.
still, its a huge blow to me. i though my life was all safe and sound. now, there is no waterpolo next year. to kids out there, sports is their life. well, we're in the bay area, so we can bounce back more readily. all we can do is leave it to the guys that more than us to work with.
i predict spring sports will have an increase of members. because, this perhaps can be the only chance you get to do sports. For who knows how long.
our future is slowly slipping down the drain due to carelessness. wonderful

ITS OVER

paralysis

he makes me laugh
totally different, exotic even
tall and thin
and those eyes...
isnt he everything i want?

yet he doesn't make my heart sing
is it because of you?
this inability to see him as anything more?
the stubbornly restraining hope.
acting as blinders

Im sorry, just give me time
it wont be fair.
if i said yes

two down

i dint swim today. i don't swim on Wednesdays because i take piano lessons so either way all week i am out for two hours after school.
but anyhows we made a random stop at the great mall. mmm, actually some people over there right after school. in the middle of the week. how odd. must be college students that have block scedule. well, i went to H&M to pick out clothes for secret santa. so, i can go ahead and check Brenden and Patrick off my list now. whew, but still i shoulda got more stuff and finish off more people too. . i picked out the most delicious colored sweatshirts for Jeremy also. a sort of mauve zip up and the most hypbeast orange pullover. yum yum. btw H&M is having a spend fifty get a 10 giftcard deal. so, we spent 100 ish. that means another trip back for more. god willing i can visit the giant one in sf...but i got a C on chem and well... :-(
i pick out most of his clothes. hes my little dress up doll. if only i can get him to wear skinny jeans.

transcribing in my chemistry labworkbook gives me a childish sense of joy

breakfast: tangerine
3rd: bag of special K and cereal bar. dennis and tommy stole my extra small clemintines
break: vat of gossip
5th: rest of the special K
Lunch: nothing...
afterschool: ceasers stix, beef jerky :- D anddd more tangerine.
Dinner: crab and butter, milk, strawberries

i h a t e how that single hour

can determine my mood for the rest of the day

you have no clue how much it hurts. how much it tears me up. not knowing.

the possibility that no matter how much i try

it could very well be all vain

spy spy!

haha, crumb by crumb had pictures today!
i also got into csf. look for me in the schoolloop. i hope i dont look retarded!

mmm. i think itll be cool how photog2 and 1 have the same period and class. fun, i can be with my friend who can help.

ah, i hope i can go sf with tiffany. we will take the bart and trolly around. depends on my grades. whenever i get an A on my tests i get special privlidges. Which is my motavation for studying. i still have to get people presents and exchange things...
omg. and i still have to crochet Andre's scarf by break. i got the design down anyhow. perhaps ill give it to him after break? cause im bogged down right now.

buttons and zippers

fourth period just made my day. we took a short easy quiz and had the rest of the class to ourselves. Andre w and we ended up just doodling all over each other's math notebooks. When i arrived for swimming i found out that we were swimming with Danica's group. with was a really good thing because gold was on taper. for about half an hour everyone got partners and drylanded. one would kneel on the towel with their hands on their heads. the partner would grab their elbows and pull up and back. yeep. i learned a lot more partner stretches to show off at waterpolo haha. oh, and there was a HELLA hot guy at west polo i saw. anyways my favorite is the one where you lie flat on your stomach with your arms spread eagle. then while slowly deep breathing you move one leg up and touch the other side of your body with your toe. i was with Brian and he said his yoga is much harder. THE WATER FELT SO GOOD! it was hecka warm. like, almost bath water. we also went to the deep pool and practiced running dives and backstroke starts. we ended with a 300 social kick and 300 warmdown. oh, Vicky. Cyrus lost his googles you bought him! oh no

dregs

what i used to look like!

i had pictures...

Wow. i am so angry! i had these great pictures on my precal homework slip i wanted to upload!
but, it somehow dissapeared into thin air. i have NO idea where it went. seriously! i turned my room upside down looking...
mmm, lookbook for Vicky?

i just think...

DAMN.i dont deserve you at all
you're too much everything
and im just a screwed up nothing.
been VERY seriously thinking of letting it go.
another failure
i always seem to aim too high, ask for too much.
look at me, im in no position to demand.
anything
at all...
guess that how it'll always be



dont worry. ill be over it soon. really, im not that pathetic!
got more pride that that.

sucked into a swamp

AH!

1. Viet HW story translating
2. chem workbook
3. chem worksheet
4. English interview typed up
5. English Elder profile
6. English Joy Luck blog
7. English Heritage Notes
8. Precal Classwork
9. Precal Homework

umm.. i guess i do have a lot of homework Calvin...
oh yeah. so i went shopping with Vicky and Calvin yesterday. Almost spent two hours at Urbans.
didnt buy clothes for myself but christmas shopped instead. actually got myself some wall decals. look sick!
Gah. Christmas season is super hectic. with all the shopping and whatnot.
but, the break is so worth it. haha, Calvin told his mom he was baking buche de noel. and had to worry about running into his mom at Santana Row.
im off!

compulsion

your warm grin worth half a day of anticipation

a scrawled note worth turning the house over for

every small detail, a treasure

my thoughts tangled with a single glance

you make my name sound that way

unbidden smile creeps.

hope clawing up my inside the wall of my heart. rising and curling

then,

hastily wiped away. for fear

I dont know what the intention is

bitten lip.

doubt and hope are never alone

AIM FOR THE STARS

i finally thought of the name. its not witty or anything but it works SN: honey its natasha ADD

what i saw today in new york

when i got home andre W sent me this: http://designerman-whatisawtoday.blogspot.com
totally awesome find. consists of mens street style sketches as seen in the jungle of the big apple.
gonna break out my colored pencils this weekend and tear it up!
gratitude to my darling for the inspiration, truly

mantra

baby, its cold. lend me you're sweater to wear.

blowdryer and towel

i was so cold that lukewarm water seared my skin when i stepped into the shower. Yowch!
but, it was so worth it. must have soaped up at least four times. I love my french milled oatmeal soap. there is no other smell that warms you up like vanilla, which is what my bodywash is. btw i need a new loofah. :-/ Burts' Bees honey&shea butter body butter also has a smell that i just cannot resist. every time i rub on my arms i feel so relaxed. sometimes i just stick my nose in the container and inhale deeply. truly this is my d r u g.
horray for bath products

no pollution

as my goggles fog up all the different lights in the pool start to pinwheel and blur. above me the skies are a purple haze. somehow, the arena poles have a pinkish tint to them. underwater pool lamps cast a green and yellow. and. of course the water is a deep midnight blue. at the surface all the colors seem to meld together and swirl whenever anyone splashes. i cant hear anything much and i dont see the other swimmers either. also, im slow and cant make the times. so, im basically doing my own thing for two hours. so peaceful once i get past the roaring ache in my shoulders and arms. and get into a steady pattern of freestyle and feel nothing exept my breath as i do a flipturn. spin, and push off.
i feel as if im suspended in space. the universe spinning beneath me. the skies swirled above me. empty space stretched far and dimly illuminating dark shadows. near the surface that move silently.
when i swim i can escape.

im allergic to chocolate sorry

hey, were you hiding from me? haha. thats cute.
sorry, i was walking my friend down. next time ok?



people say.

i should just give it up.

not a chance in hell.

don't be stubbornly optimistic.

but, what can i do?

just too damn compulsive.

you tell me

what i need to hear

Aye on seven

haha. got an 81 on my test right? found out i actually got the last answer right so, now its an 89. yeah! im not super asian, its just that it means momll let me go shopping :-D. saddle up Vicky and Calvin we're goin' on a full day shopping bonanza. we'll shop till our innards bled and we have to sell our organs on the black market for cash. just helping the economy ya' know.


OH, JOYOUS OCCASTION IT IS MY FAVORITE HUSBAND'S SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAY. I LOVE YOU RYAN KWOK!
i hope you liked your birthday kiss and card!


took Ross home again. and he does not have a cute butt like me. abbas called for help on chemistry while i was in the shower. ha.
piano was cool, i love my teacher mrs. Gee. she's going to teach me Paramore. Misery buisness.